Monthly Archives: May 2016

Twitter, Kitten, and more!

I don’t write on this blog as much as I’d really like to, but I felt like giving some updates for those interested.

First of all, about a month ago, I made a twitter account, finally. There isn’t much to it, but it’s a start. I’ll try to keep updated with that as much as possible. I’m trying to get a bigger presence social media wise, so it’s a nice first step.

Second! My life has been absolutely overwhelmed by the cutest little menace ever. His name is Beau and we love him: 13327490_10207204974905266_8015567601849003824_n

The decision to adopt the little orange tabby came over a month after our eldest cat Buddy passed away at 19 years old, almost a week after his birthday. His death was very difficult, as it was only the second time I’d ever lost a cat, and he was suffering so much in the final days of his life.

But Beau has breathed new life and laughter into the house and we are so grateful for him, even if he exhausts us! Our cat Lilo is still trying to figure out how she feels about him, two weeks later, but she’s coming around.

Also, a big happy Memorial Day to all of those who have served, and to those who have loved ones in the services, or who may have lost. Thank you, for any and all sacrifices.

I’ll be trying to get a bit better about posting more these days. And actually work on reading more and being part of the conversations. I have a hard time remembering to do it in the first place, but we’ll see how this attempt goes.

I have edited a couple of the pages, the “Where’d you Go?” page and the sort of About Me page “What’s a Novice Wordsmith?” I’ve also added another, that will serve as my page for social media links. Just the Twitter for now, but if I add more, they will go up there!

That should do it for the updates for now! Expect another post from me within the week.

The Novice Wordsmith

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Intimidated Part 2

Continuation from here and here.

I’ve struggled for years with the idea of being good enough. That stretched into this blog, especially when I was updating it more frequently. Inevitably, I found people who were doing so much better than I was and they were putting in less effort.

I never really found out what pulled people into those blogs. What was I doing differently? What wasn’t I doing?

And it’s a maddening process in its own. I know I’ve spoken at length in many different posts about not comparing yourself to others and how the ladder you have to climb could vary from someone else’s. Shorter, longer, thinner, wider. What they do with their style and their words is much different from what you can do with yours.

With a fresh fear of failure, I’ve spent years being passed over any time I’ve tried to put myself out there. Things I thought I was a shoe in for, I’ve been rejected for other, more talented people.

But in spite of how much I’ve seen rejection, both in my searches for a job, and for my writing, I have a strong confidence in my stories. Whether it’s well founded or not is to be seen. Though I believe I’ve got decent skills, I’m shown time and time again that not many people probably feel the same.

Still, it doesn’t stop me from feeling a surge of need whenever I see others getting published, whether its on their own or through publishing companies.

I feel like I can do it, too, and have decent success. But if I can’t get many people to read a blog, then what good am I going to have with a book? Hell, what kind of luck would I even have on a bigger platform like Wattpad, for that matter?

This is just me beating a dead horse. Expressing fears I’ve had and voices before. That I want to keep trying, but I’m afraid of being hit on the wrist and told no. Of being shown that my writing isn’t actually as good as I think it is, but rather poor.

Someone I “work” with (I volunteer at the organization she works at), has been working on a novel that’s been such a pleasure for her to write. Her excitement is just absolutely infectious, and even when she’s just starting to get it cleaned up, she’s already thinking about publishing. She doesn’t care what it yields, she just wants it, and I wish that vigor followed me.

I guess I have to regard all processes with the same attitude: Go for it, no matter what the outcome is. Just enjoy it.

But I can’t deny the need to be recognized. To feel like I’ve reached people and they enjoy what I’ve written just as much. Part of me still feels like I’m doomed to be in the background and that my work isn’t worth the attention.

I’ve also had the inevitable, “Well, everyone loved Twilight and 50 Shades, why shouldn’t I be given some time?”

To their credit, both of those stories are easy to read and have a broad, easy message to understand. They’re easy to devour, to get into, if you can ignore the repetition and spelling mistakes and stiffness of the writing.

As competitive as fuck as I am, it’s hard for me to say it’s simply for enjoyment, but I am trying. I know better than to have expectations, but I can’t help that hopefulness that’s burned inside of me since day one. To be seen, recognized, and celebrated.

Whatever this burst of confidence brings, though, at least I’ll have tried. Right?

The Novice Wordsmith

Routine

My professor for fiction writing, years ago, told us that the key to writing daily was to get into a routine. Find a specific time of day you want to write and do it, every day.

Except every time I tried, I failed. I continue in some amalgam of a routine, writing usually at night, going into the late hours and hedging into my sleep, more often than not. But I can’t set a rigorous schedule. As you’ll see in the article I link, there are some who agree with me.

But then there are those who don’t. Who speak highly of the routine, of a set schedule of how and when to write and have much to say of the benefits of it.

Either way, I invite you to read the gorgeous piece of The Psychology of Writing and the Cognitive Science of the Perfect Daily Routine by Brainpickings.

-The Novice Wordsmith